妈ybe deep down I refused his idealism and existentialism, which in essence is a form of post-modernism that we all know is toxic.
It sounds to me that you are actually highly idealistic yourself, and when others fail to conform to your ideal, you get angry. But not having read Frankl, perhaps he means idealism of a different sort. Maybe you can clarify for me, and how it is a form of postmodernism. Regardless of that, I think my point still stands. You seem to not only have a highly idealistic outlook; it is also unrealistic. You hold up others to impossible standards and then get angry at them for not living up to your idealized image. Do you see how self-defeating that is, and how it makes you bitter and angry? Do you realize that's how you come across to others - as angry, contrarian, complaining?
I think it would be more helpful for you - and to the people with whom you interact - for you stop getting angry at the world for not living up to your image, and start getting angry at yourself for not living up to who YOU could be. Other people will not change to live up to your standards. The world will not reshape itself in your image. But you can change yourself, if you want to.
Yes, I'm angry because this is another lie exposed about our heroes. Just like the C's and others exposed Mother Theresa for being quite dark, maybe it's time we woke the hell up and saw this:
I thought Frankl left a bad taste in your mouth "for a long time". So what is making you angry? It doesn't sound like you personally held Frankl up as a hero of yours. Same with Mother Theresa? Maybe it's time to stop looking for perfect heroes and start becoming the person you wish your heroes could have been.